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There’s something not right about her. She’s a very nice old lady, from Europe, but, the way she imposes upon her students is wrong. I think that’s all. She also hides it behind layers of entertainment, pretending to be a friendly old lady type, but really, she’s vicious. I don’t know. I don’t really have the words for it.

German keyboard. Made in China. German design. Not sure how I feel about that. It has some nice placket clacks for sure.

Been doing a lot of computer engineering lately. Not hardware, but software and cloud. (I guess it goes Hardware — > Software –> Cloud). It’s mind-blowing to think that humans have finally added another layer of abstraction on top of computing infrastructure. And reminder that computing power is for answering complicated questions. So anyway, probably not necessary unless some sort of alien invasion and Russian roulette with pop quizzes. Or something like that.

Satirizing me, always. The voices. Not sure.

Getting along with other organisms and forms of life. I feel this is an improvement–even if I’m still a total abuse victim. Dad downstairs making suspiciously inverse paranoid loud bang bangs, which I can hear–either real, imaginary, or complex. It’s nice to know…

Not much freedom these days. Not sure. America. Not the best. Nowhere is.

Thoughts of economics. Raw materials. Running water and lights at night. Things like that. More important than I thought. The fight against nature, without killing it. Sustainable harvest, at worst–hopefully. Horrifying ramifications for loss.

War. Thoughts of war. Not sure why. Super unpleasant. Don’t want.

No thoughts of the epidemic. I wear my mask when I go out for walks either on my own through the neighborhood or with mom and brother at the park. I social distance. Not sure. That’s about it. I guess many people are still dying, but no one person is at high risk of death. So that’s nice, i.m.o.

Working on the game with mom. Nothing to say much of there; digressions into Development Operations for some reason. Not too useful of a discipline, honestly, from what I’ve seen so far trying it out myself. Kind of like, people at computers who can’t do things beating around the bush about it with wasteful use of computing power. Yeah. So. Saddening, I suppose. Saddening, not sad.

Dinner was some teriyaki. I don’t want to go more detailed than that.

House is nice. Getting less restless. People make me nervous. Everyone seems like a dictator. I get sufficient exercise more or less, and fresh air, I suppose. So what’s the bother? No complaint. Just miserable. Nothing loss. Not sure quite why or how.

Striving for new forms of language. Always wish to improve my English. Super!

That’s it.

By varjakBaby

Clinging, reaching out. Crying wolf when it's reasonable--all the fucking time. No one listens; you may free your ladder from the basement as due to rescue the light on the roof of the night sky. Favorite cheeses, in no particular order: Gouda, muenster, provolone, Havarti, Monterey Jack.

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