Tonight is a clusterfuck. First I watch this streamer online, and then I get a psychotic break, and now I’m hearing voices and it’s so unpleasant.

I took my Depakote early and I have to take more (like UP my dose) tomorrow morning according to the psychiatrist, which I’m fine with as there is lab evidence that my blood concentrations are too low to be effective.

Which makes sense.

No one understands how difficult hearing voices is. No one has exerted quite enough compassion for me to believe that people actually understand how difficult it is. It’s painful, yes, but it’s also confusing, which is something I have not traditionally been prepared for at all.

I won’t bitch anymore. I’m just going to listen to Edith Piaf speak gibberish French (in song) and mind my own business.

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