The chances of me doing anything right now to change my life are slim. I feel super stuck in the same routine and consumption patterns. It’s gross. There’s no breaking out of it. I can’t stand it. I hate my life. There’s no one to talk to about it, either. My doctors don’t respond to my messages asking for help and I only get to talk to them once every 4 weeks. The healthcare system is shit. At least when I had a private therapist I could talk to him biweekly. At least I had that. Even he asked me to do stupid useless pointless exercises, though. The training is completely wrong. I don’t know who eats this fecal placating shit but it’s gross. What they teach is just trash. My words are failing me. I’ve had a lot of negative sentiment lately and I’ll have to find better words to express it. But of course I don’t read so I’d have to check up on a dictionary, and doing the slightest thing against my desire is nigh impossible. I’m so stuck. I need help and I don’t see it coming any time soon.