I thought my kratom was arriving last night by 9 PM but they make the tracking website so ambiguous and hard to decipher that I don’t know what’s going on, maybe it’s in Florida last night by 9 PM a shipping facility? I should check my mailbox.
Well here I am, writing again. No use to it but the life it makes. Not makin babies, just life energy resource sentiment feels.
Woke up before my alarm at 830 and stayed in bed, turned off the alarm, stayed in bed until like 10. So I can wake up on time if I have to. It’ll be annoying the first week (and hopefully ONLY the first week).
Dad needs help lifting something heavy downstairs that he undoubtedly ordered. It’s his problem and his fault, why would anyone help him. He’s such a nasty person if he wants help maybe he should act nicer. Dick-head.
Alexandra Botez is hot. She’s a Twitch chess star. Brown wavy hair. Long. No nudes online, obviously. Some girls grow up responsibly, as it turns out. There’s no dick pics of me or anything. I guess that would be mindbogglingly gross, now that I think about it.
I wonder if there are a lot of fakes on the dark web. I wonder how dark it really is.
Today, tomorrow, the weekend, annnnd work. Something doesn’t feel right about it and I don’t know what.
My therapist says I’m depressed. It doesn’t feel like depression but I guess there’re different kinds. It seems only natural. Dad’s a bitch. Fuck that guy. So hard.
It seems only natural that there would be different kinds of depression. I have to go for my walk. I had my morning kratom then vomit episode. I wonder how that will pan out WHEN I WORK the legendary words imprinting into my retina through repetition.
I should go on my walk early today, or I’ll get the opioid high and fall asleep all day again. As in, now.
I’ll go do that.
No wait, i won’t, I don’t feel like it. It’s too comfy at home. And cold outside. Wahhh.
It doesn’t feel right to have a job after all this time off. Which is too bad for me.