I feel that I am a meritable person. That I have not enough connections, to share my thoughts and love for life, that I ought to, and that this is unjustly unfair.

Why am I so alone on the internet? I’ve been around for so long, and I haven’t met any acquaintances.

I deleted my linkedin profile out of fear. I don’t know why exactly but also someone said something to the extent of that it was a capitalistic dance for the king, the jester performing. Yeah. That makes sense.

My twitter is coming along. I read some Maria Popova. Reading is still an effort for me, but I find I am able to force myself to go through with it more often in the last few days. I think tinkering with my medication should help.

Great success studying data science. I ought to be doing more, I always ought to be doing more. But I don’t know…

Mother and I are going to assemble a bookshelf thing, bookcase, and I am dreading it. I hate manual labor so much. Wow. But it will be another productive thing that will make me feel better after it’s done.

Why this formula? Overcome challenges you don’t want to overcome, feel good? Why is this simple formula ruling my life? No diversity to it yet, unless I’m blind. But I do think I am. Photography, data science, work (biology), poetry, and whatever else comes up in my social media feed. That’s diverse, no?

My history is terrible. I never studied too much and don’t have much context for world events. I can’t believe some people know so much. It astonishes nme.

Well anyway. A few more minutes and then I’ll have to wake up mom.

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