I’ve been feeling particularly terrible lately.

I know how bad it can be, wow, can it be bad. It’s amazing how bad it can be. It’s not fair. It doesn’t make physical sense that it can be that bad.

It’s not that bad for me, right now, at least.

I want to get on with this suboxone therapy and over with. Imagine if I didn’t have it available. Nick would have in effect ruined my life had the medication not been invented yet.

I feel particularly fat, too. Stretch marks and rummy tummy and boobsicles, kinda. Fat male.

I don’t feel too good. As usual there is no one to talk to, no one to wake up to in the morning but my mother, my brother, who are always the same people, never say anything new. Brother was talking about some nutritional supplement and hormones in the kitchen today. I don’t know. He must work very hard on it.

I don’t know what to say. I’ve resolved to allow my posts to end suddenly.

Working on my French exercises. I slept through the afternoon during work today again because the kratom poisoning made me somnolent, so I don’t know if I need to make it up now or not. I don’t have that much to do this week, but it’s not fair to people with shitty jobs that I don’t have to work around the clock. I don’t know. Some jobs are really unfair. I have my work laptop open just next to my pc here. Reading the instrument manual still, the second one.

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