I’m feeling more calm and reasonable now. My panic attack / psychotic episode seems to be over. I have no way to rationalize it or explain it when it happens. I don’t have a clue. It feels so real. I can’t believe it isn’t. I mean I know that now, that it isn’t, but while […]

I feel like I would just be so ashamed of showing my face here. Like it would trigger me and just be so negative I wouldn’t blog anymore. The last day has been a nightmare. I took a nap and it finally got better. I better watch myself. Sleep is crucial. Wow. And yes, I […]

I need to be more easygoing. What am I doing. I still have to do this. I think I’m a junkie. I feel terrible for No. Fucking. Reason. I have to work in lab tomorrow! Ahh! What if I can’t!? Well it’s only training. You are, prepared, believe it or not. You’ve thought about it […]

I am in so much pain. Wow. These psychic Christian fraudsters outside in the cortyard are terrorizing me. I think they’re white nationalists. I don’t know why they’re picking on me but naturally it’s b/c I am mentally ill. So no surprises there. I figured out how to identify a panic attack early this morning […]

I hope I can remember what I came here to discuss. Let me, hold on, give me a second to try to remember (I’m sorry I didn’t get much sleep (which I wholly believe is just an excuse but whatever))… IF. If. If. If here’s a deal. Here’s a deal. If the voices went away, […]