It’s fucked, all of it

I tried scheduling an apt with my doctor for my neuropathic nerve spikes (excruciating but not constant, sporadic frequent when occuring, infrequent when not occuring), but Kaiser’s scheudling system is down.

Fuck you and spelling. Read my shit or ot, I’m not fixing it for youl garbage.

Dad’s an evil stalker.

He’s very powerful though so there’s nothing I can do about killing him in the imagination.

Tennis with middle brother tomorrow.

Dad’s on teh sofa on the computer downstairs.

I had a slice of pizza I didn’t want because mom’s cooking is atrocious. I mean, her borscht is awesome, I had 3 bowls today (?), but that wasn’t enoughf or my appetite because it’s low cal food. Alfredo would’ve been good. This is why you cook for yourself. It makes sense. Your brain is connected to your stomach. Not soemone else’s. Mom doesn’t realize this yet, her pregnancies finished up a while ago but she missed the train… 3 times…

Sigh.

I live with such retardo parents.

Good thing the brothers escaped. But they haunt me still too.

What role does the NSA have in all of this? God I hate the government. I wish it was taxes and that’s about it. But it’s like, they fuck you so hard in so many ways. Why?

Sigh.

-_-

Words we do not mention.

To not bring forth bad ideas.

Logical! Is it not?

Now about jewelr.y..

What to say.

I am allone.

I have so many enemies.

I can’t afford relationships because I have so many enemies.

Sigh.

I want to be at peace.

I don’t like beingin a psychic war zone all the time. It’s exhausting. But I can’t even sleeep.

At least I”m not craving coffee right now.

Somehow.

Mom goes to work soon. I ca’t wait so I get to say hi to her.

And then text her when she’s at work!

I don’t like when she’s asleep because I can’t communicate with her.

I wonder if it’s all fake though.

Why is reading such punishment for me?

Oh well, it is what it is. =(

I wish I had more joysd in life.

I want to be alive.

I’m not alive.

I usedf to b.e

College wasn’t that good anyway.

Some fuckers in it ruined it.

Racism: Chinks, christ-freaks. Yeah.

I have my stereotypes. Tyvm.

I’m tired.

Well anyway. I won’t give it away.

I have nothing to do.

But I spoke my mind.

That’s that.

Maybe you can do the same.

But be nice.

Or you’ll get banned,.

=(

From the world.

Into space

and asphyxiate

cuz no oxygen

sorry.

Death is excruciating.

You d on’t want it.

But that’s how just humanity is.

There’s no kidnness. It’s true.

Get real.

Life is cruel. Nature is cruel. THere’s nothing to live for but survival. We’re all doomed.

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