It’s not God. It’s not… religion. But yeah. That amazing stuff. The books. Art.
My mom. Her suffering. Her job. Her sacrifice. Her DUTY.
I finally know how bad it has been for her. And I still have no idea.
I want it quiet more. I just have to think quieter thoughts.
There are tricks and means to a peaceful life, I bet. I bet bodybuilding is not the only one. I’m sold it is. Please un-sell me. Or laugh at me and I’ll gun you down what have you.
I’m in so much pain so often. I never know why. I took my ibuprofen for the day. I just need to play tennis every day. That’s all.
Dad wants to with me.
But playing with him triggers me.
So I can’t.
It’s rough that it turned out this way.
Things aren’t how they’re supposed to be.
I think this family did not make it.
We’re in America.
But the dream is dead.