My attention span is completely shot. I don’t know what to do. I’m miserable most of the time. When I’m on the spot, even a little, I cop out like ah it’s not imprtant or fuck it just live another day or some garbagey shit like that.

I still have delusions. Yes. I still have those. Like people on the internet or around me saying things in my brain that they aren’t actually saying, disturbing things, always. Bothering me, making me feel uncomfortable and harassed and violated. It’s never good. It’s not even realistically possible stuff. But I perceive it.

I am reminded of… no fuck it I don’t care.

But I have to do something. Don’t I?

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