You don’t know this but I’ve sat here staring at this screen for minutes without writing a thing. That doesn’t sound all so impressive. But the counterfoil is that I rush myself into writing before I’m ready. I do that, too. Why Chinese people skimp on things all the time. So cheap. Wealthy Chinese man […]

I slept all day because I couldn’t stand the torture of being awake. I may also get a new keyboard. This German one is pretty shitty. Lots of spelling mistakes, very uncomfortable, lots of effort. The torture of life. I guess I’ll go back to bed. Mom will wake up, I’ll say hi to her, […]

I’m fucked. I can’t drink decaf fast enough to feel good. I can drink it fast enough, but I can’t make it fast enough, because I live with my parents. I feel miserable, because i live with my parents. Dad is watching stuff about aliens downstairs. He has schizophrenia. He says he is an alien […]


I have to indulge in the beauty of living by myself. I live with my parents, but they aren’t a part of my life. Typing is hard. My fingers are brittle. Flat statements. I have to get used to being alone. Severely alone. There’s no such thing as 100% alone because it can always get […]