I don’t know. I don’t have anything to say. When it’s overwhelming I’m supposed to blog. But I don’t see how this helps. I need to somehow find some value in my life. My neck and back hurt from slouching because the ergonomics of my desk and computer and chair are so horrid. The psychiatrist never answers my questions, answers which I desperately need to make decisions about my medications. But SSRI’s increase psychosis, so why do that. SSRI’s are evil. Fuck. What do they teach in med school? I bet it’s memorization with no scientific justification. Dogma, in other words. I bet that’s how it’s done. Doctor’s are no better than priests–brainwashed by their material into a narrow-minded treatment of reality and their craft.
I feel so bad about myself. I have cold sweats, right now. Psychiatry doesn’t help. I’ve been under treatment for years. What progress is there. Why does it take so long. They gave me some anitpsychotics. Wow. A retard could do that. A good-meaning citizen with access to Wikipedia could do that. Doesn’t take hundreds of thousands of med school debt to figure that out. Fucking useless doctors. Pieces of shit.
I guess I’ll just post this. I’m supposed to say amazing poetic things. I’m just average. I’m below average. I can’t do anything.
I fucking give up.