My life is meaningless and society does not support me. I’m fucked. I can’t be productive.
Nothing is rewarding no one knows how to make quality entertainment all modern media is fucking stupid and Twitch streamers get brain retards.
There’s no point in writing in here. It doesn’t make me feel better. It’s not rewarding. I’m not helping anyone else out by being a mopey dick. Fuck. I just want to complain to my therapist openly about how ugly and miserable life is. I want to show her my view of the world, and […]
I need to exercise. I need to stop sitting in a chair all day. I have to walk, run, move my arms, play tennis, play soccer, jog run run run, I have to RUN indoor cycle lift weights, go to the gym, lift weights. Fuck I’m not doing any of that. Fuck. I feel terrible […]
Fuck. What am I doing. Why can’t I study but that’s not important. I need to think about love, and focus on it. And life. And beauty. What is beautiful anymore. What is in my life that I am thankful for. What are all these coerced words meaning. What am I saying. I wrote some […]
I have to watch some videos for my front end class but I don’t want to, really badly, kindof, I just want to talk to someone or hang out with someone. Twitch streams aren’t really, you don’t get much attention, it’s not really real. I have this like uncomfortable taste in my mouth, like lingering […]
I threw up again. I go and force it until the puke starts to taste bitter and my stomach feels relief. I don’t know what chemical is in there that is a combination of my meds and alcohol, or if that’s how it works, or if my body is producing it being triggered by the […]
How to start this. Like, super dramatic, or just whatever. I don’t know. Well anyway, point is, I drank last night. 4 beers. It’s starting to be less, when I do. But I still shouldn’t. It mixes with my meds and gives me a really bad chemically induced stomach ache the next morning. It’s like […]