It’s the same problem. I have no home, nowhere I belong. My therapist doesn’t support me. She’s American. Slut. No sense of humor. Very plasticky. Fake. Politically correct. Ugh. The worst sort of person. Nothing deep, when depth is exactly what is needed.

Mom expects things of me. I can’t do it. I have to work hard every day. With only two breaks a week. Or something. Or just the evenings off. But I sleep in late so technically I just have to work my whole waking day.

I’m never getting back into the work force. This is a joke. I’m so lazy. I have no motivation, I’m set. My BROTHER has said he’ll support me. Like I’m a retard who can’t work. I mean, I am. It’s that bad, the laziness.

I don’t know what to say. I just made a pasta dish for lunch/dinner with mom. Pasta dishes are the stupidest. Sautee shit in a pan, boil pasta, mix. So dumb. Fuck pasta dishes.

Man. I don’t know. I keep expecting like, venting here, to help. Or some miracle mood shift, people to come save me. My perspective to shift. Nothing changes. It’s fucked.

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