There’s a lot of argument going on. I can sense it. Be chill. There are so many good people in society. I see it when I go out. I am normal now. I mean, paranoid, and mother is annoying, and I don’t have the strength to be proper with her. She asks the stupidest questions […]


Remember your manners on the internet. Yes, it does all boil down to clearing your head. But, I mean, a brain disease, is a lot of boiling. I don’t know how much. So much that you have to start doing things regularly for scheduled periods of time instead of once for however long. It’s longer, […]


I tell my mother I can’t talk. She asks if there is some barrier. I nod. She asks more. I say it’s because my dad abused me as a child. She is from Old Country Russia where when a mental ill person has mental ill she says Snap out of it! So she said that […]


Voices. First thing after I woke up voices. Fuck. Holy shit. Why. This soon? It’s getting worse. No episode for… months. That is the only benefit of Latuda 120 mg. However. The psychiatrist will see what she chooses to see. Fucking failure at life. Imposing her will on others. Getting paid bizarro high money. Useless […]

Play It (Indeed)

I don’t know what to say. How do I redeem myself. These people that haunt me, do they do so for a reason? Something I can fix, perhaps? Who knows. They won’t say even if I do ask. Because it’s not real, I’m crazy, what are you talking about, varjak. Game design, web design, poetry. […]

What Else Is There To Say?

Starting to realize anyone with a search engine can find out who I am. Ugh. Fuck. Also what literary magazine I work for. Double fuck. Not a good relation. That’s why that Indian lady left our poetry group. Because I was being racist on my personal blog. Well. I still think there’s a disconnect between […]

I don’t know, I mean, in the vein of (great word) making my sentences longer for better entertainment, maybe I can do this. Writing in here is so pointless, it breaks my heart. I am now angry, I should be careful. I say mean things when I’m angry. I shouldn’t, so I should calm my […]