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Lighter, Freer

I do not know do not know what I am doing

But I feel lighter and freer

Than before

Something’s working

I’ve got to keep it up

The heaviness and self-loathing catch me off-guard

Every once in a while

But on the whole

It’s better

Still, I’ve got to write

My addictions hold me

Down

In the basement

On the floor

In hell

Want some more?

Do show and tell

I’m free

To imbibe, smoke, and split

Don’t ever quit

I must admit

That my desire

Is not the fire

It once was

And that’s a good thing

I’m mellowing out

Got to catch my doubt

In my hands

This is my stand

Maybe the latter

Will follow suit

And maybe I will

Not pursue

My dilemmas

To the ground

Cross the sound

The sound sings to me

It is ‘live

It is string

It is theory

You’re still there

I thought it was over

Sing to me some more

I’m just a chore

Washed up on shore

Well then

Maybe it begins

Again

Thank you

For seeing it with me

An extra pair of eyes

Is worth in gold

Ever told

Your grandmother that

You hate to see

Such misery?

In the noose

In the duct

Kiss my luck

Goodbye

 

Goodbye