I have nothing to do. I can’t read. If there was a medication that could heal you of your crazy but it meant you couldn’t enjoy reading, would you take it? I bet most of you wouldn’t. They never told me this would happen as a side effect. They never told me the side effects. […]
My meds are still treating me like shit, as you can tell.
I just feel kind of lost in life. My job’s not very fulfilling so I’m toying with the idea of getting my PhD but I’d have to study for the GRE and my attention span is not so good because of my meds. So I guess it will just take longer, a little at a […]
My problem is I need intellectual fulfillment, but my dopamine system is destroyed so I receive no pleasure from actually performing intellectually fulfilling things, and in fact they are painful. It’s a Catch 22 and it ruins my life.
The problem with having a dopamine deficiency is you don’t find that cozy pleasure from things that you love. You’re part dead inside. Great medicine.
Maybe the psychosis will just go away on its own. You know what started it? Pot. I had my first telepathic experience on marijuana, and it was excruciating. I still get spikes of it from time to time. If it IS pot, if I exercise enough the deposits in my fat should burn away. Might […]
This place is sort of the unofficial log of my schizophrenia. I am diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder but I’m not depressed anymore so I think the diagnosis should be changed to bona fide schizophrenia but they didn’t do that because psychiatry is an ineffectuate shitshow. I can’t stay in my room too long because of […]